annabtg | Gay rights and related thoughts

The following has been going around in several of my friends' journals:

"Why is it that as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands?"-Ernest Gaines

We would like to know who really believes in gay rights on livejournal. There is no bribe or a miracle or anything like that. If you truly believe in gay rights, then repost this and title the post as "Gay Rights". If you don't believe in gay rights, then just ignore this.

It's made me think, do I or do I not believe in gay rights?

Personally, I believe very much in equal rights for everyone. I believe that everyone has the right to do what they want with their lives without being judged - as long as they don't judge others, too. I believe everyone has the right to have their own political, religious etc. beliefs, as long as they're not offending and derogatory to people who disagree with them. I believe in defending these beliefs and even trying to convert other people to them, as long as it's done with respect and has a reasonable approach, and it's not forcing, threatening or exercising any kind of pressure to the other person to accept your views. I believe in exchanging views, and learning what we can about each other's opinions.

These rights I recognize to everyone. Including gay people.

What's making it so hard to just repost these three lines without all this comment?

I think it's that I don't really like homosexuality. Now listen to me carefully: I have my own views on things, and I never thought of excluding someone because they disagreed with me on some points. Whenever political, religious or other differences made it impossible to get along with some people, it was because the other person just couldn't agree to disagree, and would either make fun of my beliefs or otherwise be annoying and patronizing. I've experienced that first-hand, and it was hurtful, which is why I *never* want to be like that myself.

The thing is, for some reason, different sexual preferences are kinda harder for me to accept than different political views, different religions or whatever. I think this happens because sexuality is more than a state of mind; attraction is something physical, and, biologically speaking, I find it abnormal that someone would be attracted by someone of the same sex so much. I mean, it's happened to me to find other women beautiful, even sexy, but there's an abyss from there to considering a homosexual relationship.

And I realize that the word "abnormal" sounds harsh, so let me explain myself.

For better or for worse, the man has evolved from the state of being an animal like all the others. Animals, as a rule, have the instinct to reproduce, so that the species would survive. Most of them don't mate for life. They don't live in organized societies - or, in any case, not as organized as ours.

When the man started living in organized societies, he adopted the model that his instict dictated him; the model that would allow him to reproduce. Heterosexual relationships are more natural than the homosexual ones, because they're driven by the reproduction instict. I've heard that some animals have homosexual relationships. I don't know if it's true or not, but the animal nature is so that there are no strings attached to the relationships, no birth control, and generally it can't be compared to the human of this era.

Now, when the human society evolved so much that survival was no longer a concern - because who thinks that humans are going to become extinct anytime soon? - the homosexual relationships were given space to grow. And because the heterosexual relationships (at least in the western civilization model) have become long-term and there have been legal rights given to the heterosexual couples, the homosexual couples are requesting the same thing. When you look at it that way, it's only fair.

So "gay rights" are more than just the right to be different. If I support gay rights, I should also support gay marriage. That's a tough one. Religiously, I don't; I'm an Orthodox Christian, and our church's texts clearly require a man and a woman for a wedding to take place. Marriage, however, in today's society, has lost the religious significance it used to have, so I'll look at it from a civil rights perspective instead.

From that perspective... no. I see nothing wrong with it. Living together, sharing their belongings... could be a man and a woman, two men or two women. No difference.

Raising kids? That's a more difficult one. Kids are the fruit of heterosexual relationships. You need a man and a woman to have a kid - unless you go for cloning. But strictly on the matter of raising one, if divorced/single parents can raise kids, why not gay couples, too? Having only a mother and no father couldn't be worse than having two mothers and no father.

What if accepting gay rights brought over an explosive rise of gay people's numbers, and the minority became a majority?

This thought is disconcerting to me. It would mean a drastic change in the human society. Perhaps it wouldn't endanger survival, since we have developed methods of having children without having sex. But I don't think it might happen. Even if we accept that our society is going "backwards", with getting married easily thinking you can always divorce if it doesn't work out, the liberation of having sex outside of marriage and the right to be a single parent leading us back to the animal sexuality model, in that model heterosexual relationships have prevailed. So no worries there.

I guess the problem for me is exactly that: that we're going backwards. Personally, I like the sexuality model my religious faith dictates me, and I actually plan to follow it. I'd like this model to prevail. But I neither can, nor want to force it on anyone. If you want to have sex before getting married, it's your choice. If you want to have homosexual relationships, it's your choice. I believe I have the right to do what I want, just as long as I don't offend you. I recognize the exact same right to you, just as long as you don't offend me.

So I guess this means I accept gay rights too. Still, I don't like homosexuality, but I'm trying to follow a "hate the sin, not the sinner" policy. If someone's gay, for whatever reason, it doesn't mean they should be excluded from the society. Just as long as there's respect from and towards both sides.

See ya,
Anna.